.hispiration, part 1.

Several weeks back, I posted that a new column would be born on this blog and it would be called, ".hispiration." .hispiration. would be thoughts from the mind of the groom. Not just any groom, but my groom. With only seven months left to plan, we finally have our first entry. You see, as you read his entry.... I never gave him the list to which he referred. After a little bribery, he finally came around and wrote this for the blog.

This is for you, dear brides and wives, take what he says and keep it- because it is true! I can give you a new reason everyday as to why I won the "Husband to be Jackpot" and this is one of the reasons why... he cares enough to share his thoughts. Read on. Enjoy. Comment and ask for more!!

I find it ironic that I write professionally for a living, yet I stare at this blinking cursor trying to come up with something clever to say.

How about a topic regarding the mind of a future groom? Since we spend countless hours trying to figure women out, why not give you intel on what goes through our heads during the exhausting months of wedding planning.

First, let me start by saying “Congratulations”. You tagged and bagged him. You reeled in one of 3 types of guys. The first, is the guy who has always been stoked about getting married. While all his friends wanted to go through a few dozen girlfriends first, your groom was already looking forward to walking down the aisle. The second guy, is the career oriented, I’ll wait type of gentleman. The one who knew he’d get married, but wanted to move up the career ladder first, then meet the right woman. Then there’s the guy who many of you know, the third gentleman. He’s the commitment phobe. The guy who never knew that a woman get’s 2 rings for her wedding (Why should he? he’s never tying the knot). He’s the one who has accepted that he’ll probably never have kids. He’ll just enjoy happy hour and date until he’s old and wrinkly like Mick Jagger. Well, if you snagged him, then you deserve a big round of applause. Because he changed all his future plans of single stardom for YOU.

Let’s talk weddings. I’m willing to bet you have your binder and list of venues you’d love to check out. However, your groom doesn’t seem so enthusiastic about all the planning. Honestly, we don’t care about the invites, save the dates, flowers, etc. What we really care about is YOU, the food, and what you’ll look like walking down that aisle. WE want our socks knocked off and our jaws to drop when we see you in that dress. However, I’m a firm believer that a couple should be in the planning together. If you want to get your groom in the groove.

Here’s some advice:

We don’t mind that you’ll plan most of the wedding. Believe me, you won’t hurt our feelings. However, if you’d like to get your groom to help out, then why not make a short list of errands. NOW, when I say “short list” I mean it. A long “WEDDING TO DO LIST” sounds like it’s more of a nagging list than anything. So, my advice is to keep it short at first. Then add a few more down the road. The approach with the “to do list” is critical. Start off with a smile and a big kiss. That way it get’s his attention. Then ask how his day went, look at him straight in the eye when doing this so get his undivided attention. Then go into something that sounds sweet and diplomatic. “You know I love you, and I don’t mind planning most of our wedding. But, it would mean the world to me if you can do just a couple of things to get the ball rolling so I’m not exhausted doing all the planning. It’s only a few things, and it would mean so much to me. Again, I’ll do most of the planning. Please “INSERT CUTE PET NAME FOR GROOM HERE!”
The disclaimer is that you’ll do most of the planning. Guys, don’t have any wedding planning in their blood. It’s just NOT us, and we run the risk of being the office joke from friends if we talk about what colors we want and etc. The key is the delivery, not nagging or sarcasm. Just a sweet – eye to eye conversation asking for his help and what it means to YOU.

I promised my lovely fiancée that I’d offer a little advice into what goes through the mind of a groom. Well, I hope this helps. Take it from a guy who was groom #3 on my list. Yeah, the commitment phobe guy. What it boils down to is, any guy can be all “machismo” about not getting married and joys of single life. However, when YOU finally meet the ONE that destiny planned for you. Then, all your guy rules go out the window. That’s what love does to you. :D

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