.invites. .rsvps. .and headaches.

I’ve already heard tons of horror stories on guest lists and RSVPs…. And thought that, for some reason, we would be exempt from any drama. Ummm…no! Our final invites were sent out in two rounds: the first round went out in January for our OOT guests. The second round went out in February for our in-town guests and for our family who has already told us that they would be coming to the wedding (some even booked rooms already!)

With two or three days left until the RSVP deadline, we were still missing almost half of the replies! So between my FMIL, Mr. Nearlywed, my mother and I, we had to make a ton of phone calls. Some people never even answered our phone calls and some said yes they will come and some, although they turned in their RSVP with a Yes or a No, some have already called to change their mind.

PEOPLE! This isn’t a carnival. This is an expensive event, where we are paying for each and every one of you to be there with us. If you RSVP no and then say yes, we are short. If you RSVP yes and then change your mind, we have already paid for you and it is rude. If you are family and have not responded to any one of the three phone calls that we’ve made, then it is rude. There, if I could say that to everyone, I would be so much happier.

I have to admit, I am really panicked about the guest list, STILL. Although we’ve written off the non responders and have heard from most people, I’d be lying if I said that the list makes me comfortable.

.sticking with some tradition.

I am marrying a wonderful Filipino guy. I am a full blooded mutt mix of Polish, Czech and Greek…. The only thing that our cultures have in common in being Catholic and The Money Dance. My future mother in law explained the role of “Sponsors” to us and we tossed the idea around for a while on whether or not we would like to have any.

Since we aren’t having a traditional Catholic wedding, we weren’t sure if we should move forward with this tradition or not, but in the end, we decided to go for it. We have two sets of couples here, in Vegas, whom we look up to, respect and are happily married for years and years.

We, unfortunately, had to ask our couples via phone because we were unable to get together with them, but no matter how we asked them, they were thrilled and honored that we asked them to do this.

Well, apparently we didn’t research their roles well enough because they asked us what we wanted for them to do and we were clueless. We aren’t doing a unity candle, cord & veil or coin ceremony. So in the end, we designed them as “Primary Sponsors”, which was described as such:

The Principal Sponsors (aka Ninang and Ninong): These are women and men whom the bride and groom respect & admire. They are, as in the early days of the Church, sponsors of the couple attesting to their readiness for marriage and freedom to marry. These are often aunts and uncles or close friends of the family. In the Philippines, they are the official witnesses of the state and they sign the marriage license. Worldwide, their participation is symbolic of the wisdom & support they shall offer the new couple. The number of sponsors can vary from a single couple to many couples. The Principal sponsors are part of the bridal procession. At the nuptial blessing, they may also be invited to come up with the celebrant and to extend their right hands to join in the prayer of blessing. In doing so, they are fulfilling their roles as sponsors.

We will acknowledge them during the ceremony and then have them enter during the reception. There- a compromise on traditions.

.and then there were shoes.

Whew… getting my shoes was a struggle, without any exaggeration. I first took them to a reputable store, which I’ve heard was expensive, but come on…how expensive can it REALLY be?

Well, here is how my conversation unfolded at store #1:

Me: Hi. I’d like to get this pair of shoes dyed to match this fabric swatch. And can you fix the heel on the inside, they flop off.
Guy at the store: Ok, sure we can dye them. That will be eight each. And the heel, well they will have to rip it apart and reconstruct it.
Me: No thank you. Ok, can you also dye this other pair to match this other fabric swatch?
Guy at the store: Sure, (taps calculator)…. That will be One hundred sixty dollars.
Me: HUH? (Look of shock and fright on my face) I thought that you said, “EIGHT EACH?!?!?”
Guy at the store: No, I said EIGHTY.
Me: Grabs shoe boxes and everything and runs out the door, saying, “no thank you.”

When I was in high school, dyeables were all the rage for proms and homecoming. Taking them to Thom McCann and having them dyed cost all of maybe $12 back in the day?? And now you want to charge me $80? To be honest, that is more than I paid for each pair of shoes.

So I use the Google and find another place. When I show up, to say that I was shocked at the goods for sale in this establishment would be an understatement. On the left side, they sold hookah pipes, in the middle they sold handbags and shoes, in a display case, on the right; they made keys and fixed shoes. When I presented the store owner with my swatches, he was kind enough to test out the colors on some fabric. The green was a no brainer; it was the purple that frightened me. I really wanted something dark for my reception dress…. So I left the green shoes, walked out with the purple shoes for another week.

Long story short, he dyed them both for $40 each and they look great! The colors look amazing and I am thrilled to have this checked off of my list!