.the story behind the dress.

For as long as I've been blogging on this site, my wedding dress was a huge source of stress. I can finally, two months after the wedding, share all with you. Yes, I could have done this sooner, but I must say this-- the wedding wore me out. It seemed like recovery was nowhere in sight at times. But here I am, to recap everything from the wedding. Let's start with my dress.

When I started out, I didn't have a budget, but in my head, I knew that spending over $1,200 on a dress (and even that was pushing it) would eat me alive. But I still tried on Elizabeth Filmore, Amy Michaelson, Vera Wang and more. They all look maaaahhhvelous. And I loved the silk charmeuse on my skin. So at one point, I went to a seamstress and took her this love of my then bride-to-be life. It is Taj Mahal by Amy Michelson. It retailed for about $3,800 at Kleinfelds. Which, by the way, shopping there is ground for a whole other blog.

Here is the dress, courtesy of AmyMichelson.com



Gorgeous, huh? After trying on this gem, of which there are no photos courtesy of Kleinfeld's rules, which we respected, I needed a sexy back dress. I wanted to hear my guests gasp after I passed them while walking down the aisle. But I refused to pay that much. It was a new dress, from the fall 2009 line, so there weren't any for sale. I also found some from Winnie Couture that had the open back and they came in my price range, around $1,200.


This is the Winne Couture "Giada" dress. I wasn't able to try it on, the only store in Vegas who carried the line wouldn't order a sample. Silly, because I probably would have bought it. So...at this point we moved on.

Come June, my sister, my six-week-old niece and I went dress shopping. Again. We turned up at a little shack-on-the-road called Tina's Bridal in Totowa, NJ. When we pulled up, I almost told her to turn around, it was that much of a shack looking place. But we went in, smart move. What I would like to say most about Tina's is that we had an appointment to look at bridesmaids dresses, but when I asked if I could see their bridal gowns, they didn't even bat an eyelash and 100 percent accommodated us. And in the end, I bought a dress there.

I wasn't looking for poofy, I didn't want any skirt underneath and then I came across two gems there. One was a "Destination" label by.... I don't even remember. Darn. This was the dress. Of course, I wanted to open the back and make some adjustments to it....




Then, there was this beauty by Jovani. I had to slide into and hold my breath. However, wearing it on my wedding was of no concern. I was the thinnest I had pretty much ever been, with no intent on gaining weight, so I was good to go in this looker. I loved the back and how vintage it looked. I pictured a glamorous walk down the aisle, posing for photos with my chin just coming over my shoulder. And my body? It would be bangin'! It was June and I had 10 months to firm up and rock this dress. Apparently, my pancreas had other plans in the weeks to come.




This is what it is supposed to look like on the model who needs to be fed a steak.


So there you have it, my dress loves.... I went from loving a $3,800 gown to not being able to try on a $1,200 gown to deciding between a $400 and a $350 gown. I ended up buying the Jovani gown.... we had it ordered in a size bigger than the sample shown in the above photos. As you can tell, it was a bit snug. I was thrilled to buy my wedding dress in a size six. As someone who battled weight my whole life, this was a huge accomplishment. However, I would only be able to bask in that glory for a few short weeks.

What happened? The rest in my next post. Which will not be in six weeks. I am going to write it now.

By the way, I have the Jovani dress in my hands and am willing to part with it. If anyone is interested please message me.

.invites. .rsvps. .and headaches.

I’ve already heard tons of horror stories on guest lists and RSVPs…. And thought that, for some reason, we would be exempt from any drama. Ummm…no! Our final invites were sent out in two rounds: the first round went out in January for our OOT guests. The second round went out in February for our in-town guests and for our family who has already told us that they would be coming to the wedding (some even booked rooms already!)

With two or three days left until the RSVP deadline, we were still missing almost half of the replies! So between my FMIL, Mr. Nearlywed, my mother and I, we had to make a ton of phone calls. Some people never even answered our phone calls and some said yes they will come and some, although they turned in their RSVP with a Yes or a No, some have already called to change their mind.

PEOPLE! This isn’t a carnival. This is an expensive event, where we are paying for each and every one of you to be there with us. If you RSVP no and then say yes, we are short. If you RSVP yes and then change your mind, we have already paid for you and it is rude. If you are family and have not responded to any one of the three phone calls that we’ve made, then it is rude. There, if I could say that to everyone, I would be so much happier.

I have to admit, I am really panicked about the guest list, STILL. Although we’ve written off the non responders and have heard from most people, I’d be lying if I said that the list makes me comfortable.

.the bad and the ugly.

Ok, yes, I am a blogging slacker… I get it. Let’s hope that this makes up for my slacking. As of today, we are 101 days away and it can’t get here quickly enough. I know that we should enjoy this special time, I won’t be a fiancé again and I won’t plan my wedding own wedding again (vow renewal, anyone?!?) but it is sucking the life out of me. For serious.

Lately, I am feeling defeated. This is the ugly side of wedding planning that I will share with you. Of all the blogs I read, this subject hasn’t come up often, but I am not the only bride who wants to just quit, go to the courthouse and get it done. If we didn’t already pay half of our event to our venue, that would be an option.

Planning a wedding could seriously be its own job and that is why there are wedding planners- it is their job. How many weddings a year do they plan? That is their fulltime job. Me? I have a full time job and am planning a wedding, so it is becoming a bit much.

While most of the details are worked out, there are logistics to handle. So… I will go ahead and post all of the things that aren’t going right, at this point.

1. The dress. I haven’t tried it on in months. SO it may fit. I haven’t lost any weight since it arrived, months ago. I’ve been working out like a fiend, which I am loving. (More on my workouts another time)
2. I need undergarments and furnishings for this dress that I am praying fits.
3. My shower, while I am VERY appreciative that anyone invests any amount of time or money into me, it has become chaotic. My sister is trying to plan it from 2,500 miles away. I have two Zillaz here who want to step in and help more. Maybe my sis wants to be a good sis and plan it all. But we ran into some snafu’s…
4. The invites weren’t done in time. So with 4 weeks until the shower, they weren’t approved or even created. I am not sure what happened and don’t want to know.
5. My wedding invites are going out now and I don’t want to crowd the mail box with a shower invite and a wedding invite. Nothing screams “GIFT” more than two invites in one day.
6. One Zilla replied to an email and CC’d me on it. It was the email with all of the shower details and a gift idea that the girls thought of for me. So of course, I read it…. I could have NOT read it. But I now I know everything.
7. Bachelorette party. A-Zilla has offered to help plan this since she is on modified bed rest. This is a GREAT thing…but then I feel badly when the cost of anything comes up. But it is part of being in a wedding; these are things that need to be paid for and not by the bride, right? I will have a stash of cash anyway.
8. My list keeps growing
9. One of the mothers still doesn’t have a dress. And when I offered to go shopping with her, she said that it was too early. Now she wants to go next month and I am slammed with work, wedding planning and staying healthy.
10. My health. In case you didn’t know, I am a Type 1 diabetic who has been doing a decent job of maintaining good blood sugar numbers. The wedding hasn’t been stressing me out too much. Well that is starting to change. My numbers are fluctuating all over the place. The other nite, I woke up with an extreme low. So even with the working out, the healthy eating, it is my life right now that is taking me all over the numbers map.

I’ve asked Mr. Nearlywed to help keep me as stress-free as possible over the next three months. Stress free and weddings don’t normally fit in the same sentence but we can see how it works out.

Ok, there ya have it. Weddings seem like fun, but they can be insane. And there is a piece of my insanity that I’ve shared with you.

.happy 2010.

Happy New Year! This is the year in which I will be married. Yippeeee! While it seems that it can’t get here fast enough, it is really right around the corner.

The planning is ho-hum, but not wanting to start the New Year with an ugly blog, I will focus on the good. The bad and ugly will come tomorrow.

With 103days until the wedding, we have:
1. Started our pre-marital sessions (another blog will elaborate!)
2. Are starting our dance lessons tonite. I am white. I can’t dance.
3. Our invites are going SOON! Yes, it is three months early, but we have a TON of OOT guests and they are getting their invites soon, it will also make for hunting down people for RSVPs a TON easier.
4. My shower is in one month.
5. Make up is booked, yay!
6. My candy buffet has been reconfirmed.
7. We are meeting with our vendors slowly and surely to wrap up details.
8. Next week I meet with someone about creating a head/hair piece for me!
9. Mr. Nearlywed and I are really working well together as a team
10. I AM GETTING MARRIED!

There are many more good things, but that is what is making me happy right now, while I am in the middle of wedding chaos. Again, that post is scheduled for tomorrow.

Yes, I still owe you more on flowers, our invites, our DJ and videographer…. Stay tuned.

I wish you ALL a HAPPY NEW YEAR! And Happy wedding year, a happy engagement year, a happy dating year, a happy year of being in your BFFs wedding because it means the world to her, trust me, I know this.

.vendor saturday.

Today is going to be one busy day....it doesn't help that I went to bed at 1 am and woke up just after 6 am. Why, you ask? When you find out, let me know.

FINALLY it is eyebrow wax time. Is it just me or does it seem like your hair grows twice as fast once you make the appointment? I made this appointment about 10 days ago, instead of styling my hair, I need to style my 'brows to keep them out of my face. They are so gawd awful right now that my sister commented on them being "rather full". How did she do this? Via webcam on Skype. Yes, you can tell from 2,500 miles away how in need they are of some grooming.

The brow obsession started back in about 6th grade when I realized that my brows resembled Bert's brows.

No, really, I mean it. And NO pre-teen should EVER attempt to fix her own brow. EVER. Doing that caused me about 18.5 years of uneven brows. So now I only trust them to Tessa, my esthetician. She's been caring for my hairs for coming up on four years. One of the few long term relationships I have here in Vegas, so that goes to show you how good she really, truly is.

Dear Tessa,

I am sorry for the beast who is coming to see you today, forgive me, Tessa for it has been about 8 weeks since my last brow wax.

Love,

The NearlyWed

Then.... I can come home, nap-- I should take my flab to the gym, but sweating for 24 hours while your pores are open from a wax is bad news, darn-- so then I will nap and head back out to meet an invite stationer and then a something super special and super secret for our wedding. What is it?? Well I may just crack and spill what it is..... lemme think about that one.

Tomorrow finds us meeting with out wedding planner to discuss what is left to do (a LOT!) in the next 3 months.... and then the final wrap ups that are due in the last three months. Wow.... only two quarters of a year until we get married. Where does the time go?

So I leave you with no exciting photos of today, but stay tuned for my invite inspiration and meeting recap. And maybe, just maybe I will share a secret with you!

.we picked a zillaz dress.

Last Saturday, K-Zilla and I ventured to the other side of town to check out the Zillaz dress. I loved it already, so this was a nail biting trip. M-Zilla went the week prior to check it out and she loved it as well. Well, at least I think that they love it. Maybe they are lying but I doubt it. So far the count is 2 yay and 0 nay. I am guessing that my other Zillaz won’t be able to try on the dress—no because they won’t, but it is a hard sample to come across.

Jamie at Bella Bridesmaid was kind enough to order a sample and even better—she ordered samples in colors that I was considering. After seeing the color “Concord”, I decided that was THE ONE. Originally, I wanted different colors for the Zillaz, but with Concord being the only color I truly like, we are sticking with one color but will wrap the dress different ways.

I love this dress so much that I’ve considered buying my own. A word to the wise: This dress runs BIG. And in sizes XS-S-M-L, which is great for those who don’t want to get measured!

In case you haven’t read my post on wanting my aisle to look more like a runway, read my post here.

We will be ordering the dresses within the next few weeks! Check that off of the list!

.more of the nearlywed whereabouts.

Ok- so in one of my last posts I said that you would soon know why I've been a mish-mash of a person. You still have to wait.


In the meantime, you can see some of the fabulous things that I've written. The fabulous is clearly subjective.


When setting up my blog, it was a no brainer to try to write for someone else too! So I sent in apps to a few blog sites and they all took me! YAY! Which means, that I am a busy writing woman right now....and in return, my blog has taken a backseat. BUT I will post some of those entries here.

On Mondays, you can find me on Tweet My Wedding, where I take one of my Twitter tweets and turn it into a blog. This is where I write the "ugly", the stuff that may not be for all public eyes. This is almost like my journal that stays hidden. But now...well....that won't happen any longer.

Twice weekly, you can find me on Bridal Buds, where I am Poinsettia Bud. This is where I try to post some inspiration, whether it is for my wedding or just in general. I find it challenging to post inspiration for something that may not work for me, but it is a work in progress.

You can also find me at Weddzilla, where I am just me (Jennifer B.). I love this blog and try to post some of my "hot topics" or current challenges with planning.

Blogging is one of my favorite things. Do I think that maybe it is over committing? Maybe, sometimes, but the stuff gets written. Whether everyone finds it interesting or not...that is personal. Most readers seem to enjoy me and for that, I thank you, dear readers. And promise to get you more content more often.

Have a great day!

.where oh where has the newlywed been.

Well Blog followers…. It has been a month almost since my last post. In that time, there have been a bunch of new followers! ::Hi, new followers!:: And hopefully it gave long time readers time to catch up on old blogs.

The months of July and August were interesting and flew by. Although, when it was 120 degrees for a week, those days crept on by. Anyway, my friend who got married in June (already THREE MONTHS AGO?!?!?!) told me that the summer flew by in her planning- and she was right. And then the next few months will fly because it’s the holidays and then darn it- it is almost the wedding.

So why haven’t I blogged? Been busy- plain and simple. And uninspired.

The summer started early in May with the birth of the most beautiful girl in the world- my niece. I was lucky enough to spend two weeks on the East Coast getting to know her. I was in a wedding and spent some time with my dear friend, A-Zilla. Then, my sister returned the favor and came to Vegas for a five days and my mother in law was here for just over three weeks. So then we enter into July. I have a break from visitors and then my parents came to visit for 10 short days. In those 10 days, we did a few wedding related things: I picked up my reception dress, we talked about favors, we saw our venues, we looked at a new venue, we gambled and ate at buffets like they were brand new. What is that I wrote?? We looked at new venues? Hmm…what does that mean?

Then, my parents leave and frankly, I am exhausted. Having guests is fun but a ton of work and once they left, it was time to recoup, recover, and rejuvenate. And connect with my hubby-to-be, again. When you have people in your house for such a long time, you start to become roommates instead of fiancés and worry too much about making sure everyone is happy and entertained. If we had no guests until the wedding, I would be a happy wifey-to-be. The months of March and April next year are going to be insane. That is all.

In August, we tasted cakes, met with a florist and some other things…. More details will follow, there needs to be a reason for keeping you reading, right?

Ok- so we passed the nine months to go and the eight months to go. We are just over seven-and-a-half months until “WE DO!” And big things are happening in the wedding of the Nearlyweds.

Now that I am back on and back to blogging…. You will have to stay tuned for the big announcement. Ohhhh….it’s killing you, isn’t it!

.the cost of being in the know.

It is no secret that being in a wedding is both an honor and expense! That was one of the reasons why it took me so long to finalize and ask my bridal party. I actually knew who I wanted to ask long before I asked them; however, knowing the costs of being in a wedding, I hesitated. As a recent bridesmaid, I know how much they cost and how much I am asking of that person to stand with me on one of the biggest days of my life. Let’s be honest—I would spend anything to be there for a friend.

In my first bridal experience, I knew that it would be “expensive” but was never quite sure until the plans started to finalize. The wedding was out of town for me and there was NO WAY that I was missing the shower. So there is one plane ticket. Then, obviously, I am going to the wedding along with my significant other (who was still my boyfriend at the time of asking, not yet my fiancé). At the time of asking, Flo and I had only been dating about six months, so I assumed that I would be paying for his trip to go as my guest. Luckily (whew!) by the time the wedding came around, we were engaged and my money is now our money. When A-Zilla had asked me to be in the wedding, the first thing that she said was that she understands how costly they could be (speaking from her experience) and if anyone can’t be in it, she understood. And she meant it; however, there is no way, no how I personally would miss this for a BFF of mine. So I buckled down and started to budget. I never kept record of my costs, but I can give you my estimate between travel, hotel, gifts, attire, spending money it was about $1500. However, the money was spread out over time so it was not one big, huge hit at one time.

With all of this in mind, I am doing my darndest to cut back on expenses for the Zillaz. I will be forever grateful for A-Zilla to let Flo and I crash at the fabu Hoboken pad before the wedding and while they were on their honeymoon! Don’t worry, we cleaned up and left them some wine for their post honeymoon return! Their kindness saved us like $500 in additional hotel nites! Sweet.

It has become my goal to alleviate as much of the Zillaz cost as possible, from dress to hair & makeup to bachelorette party to showers…. I am trying to be easy on their wallets during this “economic time”.

On Bridelines, they posted this great article told through the minds of Zillaz (not my Zillaz…yet!) and I keep this information top of mind when making any wedding decisions. Heck, it will probably cost ME more to have Zillaz IN the wedding than it will for the Zillaz TO be a part of the wedding! To view the whole article, click here.

Dollars aside, I would never trade the experience of being a part of something so special for a friend and would do whatever I can to have my Zillaz be a part of our wedding.

I hope that they still lurve me after the wedding!

.service without a smile, part 2.

::::::::::A follow up to this post.::::::::::

This will kept light, short and sweet. We had our venue walk through on Tuesday. Is it a bad sign that I was nervous? Nervous to walk into a venue that we’ve booked and are paying for? It wasn’t like we are sneaking into an Art Museum after hours, right???

Long story short…. Everything went well until we overstayed our welcome. I just personally feel like if you need something to do something unfavorable, there is a right way and a wrong way to address it. For example, if the room was being used for something else and we were still in there (after being told “psh, take your time”), instead of “If you need more time, you will have to book another appointment. We thought you were only going to be here for a few minutes” … Why not try, “Nearlywed, if you guys need more time to work on your details, would you like to use the couch in the foyer? We have to turn the room over for another event. Thank you”. Just my opinion.

When I was a wedding coordinator at Caesars Palace, I dealt with this all of time. Often, a couple who just booked a wedding or hot & tired tourists would use our chapels for a place of rest or planning. My line was, “Hi- we have a wedding starting in about 10 minutes [this is usually where people get the message and just get up and leave anyway] so I need to ask that you allow for their guests to come in. If you’d like, there are chairs in the office/hallway, etc.”

I totally understand that our venue is an active adult community, not an event venue, and that their residents are priority #1. Totally get that. My problem is how they interact with clients. Hopefully this uneasy feeling wears off…. Right now, I’m having awful thoughts and visions about the reception. Gawd, is this being Bridezilla-y?? Am I really becoming that bride? Or is there a difference between demanding that people cater to you and expecting to be treated a certain way, as a client???




On an unrelated note, my mom met M-Zilla at our GNO over the weekend.
Here is a pic of us all together- My face is rather large, isn't it?

.who presents this bride.

Last nite Flo and I took MOB and FOB to our ceremony venue and having our own little walk through. According to our sales coordinator at Caesars, the new garden chapel is underway. Ground has been broken. So the chances of us getting married here are slim, but it was still fun.

.practicing the "who presents this bride?".

.we do.

.we can't wait.

Nine months and one week to go, it is getting super exciting. Tuesday is our reception walk thru. We actually got that worked out, if you read my previous blog about the service we were getting at our venue, you can rest easy knowing that they "accommodated" us, (begrudgingly) and that we are going there on Tuesday (at the time I first requested). Imagine that- taking your client when it's convenient for them. We will see how this one goes.... if we walk out of there without bucking horns, no more words will be written.

PS: I won $22 on one spin! Sweet!

.diy or die, vol. 2.

The wedding map. Where it all begins. Since I’ve fallen in love with the loads of amazing wedding blogs out there, I decided that I did want some of the projects to be DIY. This coming from a person who has no craftiness, no designing skills, nothing. I’ve searched high and low through blogs, websites and magazines for DIY advice and help. Narrowing down what I won’t do was easy- I won’t Gocco anything, wont attempt to print my own invites, make my own centerpieces or bouquets, but here is what I will try:

Bathroom Baskets- come on. How difficult is it to grab some (ok, probably an over abundance) toiletries and toss them (neatly) into a basket (decorated, of course) and slap it (arranged and centered) on the bathroom counter? I mean really, some mouthwash (probably in a pump along with some disposable cups), a few tic tacs (in all varietals) and call it a day! Ok…who are we kidding? I am a queen of over packing, so you know that these baskets will probably be the first thing someone wants to take home. Screw the centerpieces, let’s grab the free tampons!

DIY Map- This is somewhat of an idiot project for me but something I felt that can be accomplished. Here is why: any locals who are coming will most likely know where the venues are. If not, they have phones and Google maps. Any OOT guests, we are providing transportation from point “I DO” to point “Let’s PARTY”. So really, who needs this map? No one, I just think that it will be a fun project for me! his is how the map currently looks. As I finish it, I will save step-by-step directions. In the meantime, you can search all over the web for ideas on how to put your own together. It seems daunting, at first, but if I can do it...anyone can!

Flip Flop Basket- I hate feet. I would probably rather eat a mustard and cilantro sandwich than touch or even look at feet. So to see tired and bare feet at the wedding is going to. Drive. Me. Nuts. I will have flip flops for the ladies who wish to slip on something a lil more comfortable. My DIY here is going to be buying the flops, putting them into some sort of container (beverage tub?) with a cute little sign about using them… and I’ve been inspired by other brides to put a tag or some thing to announce the size of the flop!

.photos courtesy of project wedding, summerbride2009.

Candy buffet- YES! Let them eat candy! Let the diabetic have a candy buffet! Haha. Enough said. As I lay this out and begin to purchase the sweet treats, more "along the way" photos will be posted.

One thing that I’ve learned is that every wedding may have the same ideas and the same cute things- a photo booth, a candy buffet, a flip flop bin. The great thing is that you can see a photo of others displays projects and ideas. Think that buffets and flippy floppies are too played out? Like Paris Hilton and her Chihuahua?? Think again savvy bride- most likely your wedding is still unique to your guests. Yes, who cares that you were in a wedding last month and they had a photo booth also…. Was your grandma at that wedding? What about Aunt Helen? To them, it is fresh, new and unique. So DIY away, sisters!

.savor the countdown flavor.

Every day, Project Wedding sends me an email with a fabulous tip, read, discussion or all around good story. Today’s email brought on a whole new subject- 299 days to go. Last time I wrote about how many days left, we were at 366 and 365. That was a whopping 66 days ago. WOW! Time flies. We have broken the 300 day mark. Come Wednesday, we will have been engaged for six months. No matter how much I try to tell myself that “we have plenty of time, we are just under 10 months away!” I know that I am secretly kidding myself.

Flo and I met with our wedding planner yesterday, after about a 6 + week hiatus. Once we laid the structure for the event, there wasn’t much to cover until we hit the 10 month mark. Yesterday was quite productive- I updated him on my finds and some new ideas and we started talking timelines. This is when it hit me that it really is time to get a move on. Let’s pretty much consider it July. So we have July, August, September and October, four small months, until we hit the holidays. In all honesty, November and December aren’t going to be great planning months with all of the shopping to do, holiday parties, etc. While it may be a great time for me to finish any DIY Projects, it will be a rough time to nail down and details with vendors.

Then we welcome 2010 in January. We can celebrate our one year engagement anniversary and our birthdays. Yes, the both of us. Back to back. The 23rd and the 24th. Usually, I throw myself a rather large party to commemorate the day. Not in 2010, folks, sorry! In January is when the planning will pick back up full speed ahead! Tuxes, ice carvings, dance lessons, and honeymoon planning….

So on my birthday of January 24th, that will mark three months left. Less than 90 days (yay for February being short!). Essentially, then, that leaves with me with eight months to get effective planning complete. Stellar.

I have yet to break my tasks down by month but will shortly work on it. In the meantime, I am going to enjoy my laissez faire attitude for just a few more weeks and pretend that I have all the time in the world!